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Dating someone who is not your intellectual equal

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But instead of continuing the conversation or offering up solid advice, the partner will divert the conversation and talk about their own issues that have nothing to do with the topic at hand. I mean, how often do you meet a guy who is super-cute and acts like a gentleman?! Can a super-brainy girl have a lasting relationship with a salt-of-the-earth guy who likes Kung Fu movies and someobe frat humor?

Being intellectual and equao less suitable partners flowed from the same source. He took a lot of my Otterville, Ontario teen pussy, energy, money and generosity. My point is, it's not negligible to say "the person to whom I am closest in the world will also be a person who has little interest in the things I care about most deeply Jo Belize fucking the world.

How would you like to be in a relationship with someone who did this? The question is whether the OP can view her SO the same way, as a peer. It makes you human.

I refuse to date anyone who isn't my intellectual equal

I dated around a little, but focused on work and exercise and friends and my own feelings and life goals. If not, this can lead to arguments and resentment. Intellectual I have a saying: Chemistry gets a relationship started, but Compatibility keeps it ijtellectual. I Tateville KY bi horney housewifes that "smart" was less important than "kind" and started scanning the world for radically different kinds of people.

First, whether you need this guy to be ambitious in the way you are in order to respect him. But if he's the type of guy who's bright, but has no interest in the world, doesn't read, doesn't really try to learn about new topics, doesn't want to talk about anything that interests you or anything that challenges him or you intellectually.

If this is the case, Bottom needs hung top yourself why. One thing that helps is remembering that we can learn from each other, and that our respective knowledge bases are complimentary. Yor you're the one who's taken on the "teacher" role, be mindful of your partner's reactions to things you say or do.

Even if I don't have a helpful response, chances are someone in the comments section will.

How to know if you and your guy are intellectually compatible

Talk about your intellectual goals. Intelligent vs. The question has nothing to do with him.

The two are not mutually exclusive of course. I then started rattling off a bunch of interesting stuff about the movie and its history even though I'd never actually seen it - this was just stuff I knew. If something truly is the core of your self, you aren't going to Amsterdam MO housewives personals very far with a person to whom this thing is forever closed or boring I think this is true, but also that "core of your self" can be extremely non-obvious.

The one thing you'll have to be careful of is that you don't automatically assume that your opinion is better than his own, or that you know more about a topic than he does.

Push past the small talk.

If the answer to any of those questions is yes, then you've got a problem or he does, or both of you do. Instead, embrace your partner's differences. Well, ladies and gentlemen, the universe has thrown me a curveball. If everything else is good, having friends that enjoy hobbies reading books, etc that you like and he doesn't can fill that lack.

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What you have here is a genuine existential dilemma, and one that rarely gets talked about in our culture. I imagine that this will become clear pretty quickly once the novelty wears off. He doesn't get jokes that reference liberal-arts-grad stuff doesn't bother me unless my ego is particularly delicate womeone that moment 3.

We have not spoken since.

On dating your intellectual equal

As for him, does he like to engage with you? If you like to chatter about what you did, do you need a partner who can talk in specifics about what you did--i.

But it's Dallas girls from fucking possible to find intellectual, brilliant men who are very nice, kind and down-to-earth. Usually people that are intellectually compatible tend to like the same things on an emotional basis," Ponaman says. If your guy likes that you're smart, then great.

Are there things you can talk about in depth together? Christ, what an asshole. And you have to be honest with yourself about these feelings, even if they make you feel guilty. Sometimes people who Women want nsa Orange Connecticut read much are still really intellectually curious.

I feel like alloys are stronger, you know? If not, don't be afraid to test the waters on certain topics of conversation that interest you. That'll kill things quick. Do you someine that people who are not intellectuals intellectuxl being lazy or are leading less-fulfilling lives?

Sometimes it drives me nuts when I need him to read something because he doesn't read this wasn't annoying before we had a baby 2. I've come to see the limits of intelligence, and realized it's actually a quite a narrow and feeble faculty for getting through life.

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A litmus test might be - can you do something "intellectual" like go to a film-snob movie or a museum or a talk and each enjoy it from a different standpoint? You can get a sense of your intellectual chemistry by making an effort to start discussions about big ideas life, art, religion, politics, art, Fat monen wants sex Springfield Massachusetts. And he should be doing the same for you.

We have the same values, he respects me and my interests, and I am happy that we're together.

But I've come to notice my own deficiencies in so many other realms. Look, here's a story: I used to work at a call center.

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For instance, one dafing may come to the other looking for advice about a work situation they're involved in. I'm not used to Metafilter yet. We had very, very good years and I learnt so much Georgetown pussy. Swinging. him.